Say What You Mean. Stop, Look, and Listen

Sometimes we hear only what we want to hear, just as we see only what we want to believe. If triggered, our biases filter out the true message with any communication. We can personalize something said to us and react before understanding. I can’t begin to count the number of times I have heard “that’s not what I meant”. A skilled listener and communicator can avoid this (I am reading the book Say What You Mean, a step-by-step guide on how to find your voice, speak your truth and listen deeply”by Oren Sopher).

I wrote down a couple of things I heard last week. I have played them over in my mind as I evaluate any content of truth for me. I find it interesting that these particular phrases caught my attention. Dear reader, there is no message here or conclusion to be drawn. Out of context, here is what was said. I have been thinking about what I heard. 

“Nothing really is different for me, but spring is the time for remembering.”

“If you are laughing, you are not wasting time.”

“There comes a time when you just accept you are alone and that being alone is your life now. Then you can move forward with less grief and be happy alone.”

“My life changed when I learned people-pleasing as a life strategy results in the same consequences to the nervous system as living in a constant state of fight or flight.” 

“ To do this, I need to stop with imposter syndrome.”

“Take it or leave it. I am not going to change.”

“Thank you for telling me that. My heart is so full.”

“You are not special in the Universe.”

“That is the way I am. I worry. That is what I do. I can’t change. It is in my DNA.”

“There is an element of lying and people-pleasing involved when writing, if not using your own  name.” 

Change is in the air

Happy Springtime